Sunday, October 14, 2007

Is my marriage doomed because of bipolar?

I have seen a statistic several times that states that "90% of marriages in which one partner is bipolar end in divorce". I saw it when DH first started to do the wild spending. I looked up the strange things that I was seeing at home, and all my searches came up "bipolar". So I knew for quite a while, even though the "experts" were still treating "depression". And the statistic has stuck with me. When things are going well, and when things are going not so well, that statistic pops into my head and makes me scared.

I can easily see why people would give up. A person can only take so much!

And when I realize that I am vicariously getting some of my emotional needs (regarding appreciation and recognition) met by DH's friends because he is not able to, I wonder about it, and how long it will be before things start to resemble "normal" again, and if I can hang in there that long. Today I am SURE that I can, but all it takes is a lie, or another bad check, or DH getting angry with me because I'm a "controlling bully" and I start worrying again.

It's like finding out you have cancer, and you have a 10% chance of making it. So incredibly discouraging. But I try to keep in mind that even with those kind of odds, 10% do make it, and my goal is to stay in that 10%.


kyle done said...

well i understand where your coming from many relationships i had..the girl had bipolar..90% seems right..bipolars tend to be very moody..which is never good in a relationship.