Sunday, October 14, 2007

Comfort and Relaxation

Here I am at work (again, as usual), and I've been thinking about how relieved I am to have DH's friends there this weekend. Not so much because they've been helping me out more than he has, but mainly because they are not mentally ill and they are not tied into buying any of his weird ideas or excuses. That being said, he is still spending huge amounts of Jim's money, but I know that Jim is mentally healthy and will put a stop to it when he feels it is completely out of hand. I also feel comforted by the fact that if something goes wrong at the house, there is someone stable there to take control. I didn't realize how nice that was, until his friends got here.

DH is very worried that his friends are going to realize that he is not the same person he was two years ago, and that they won't like him any more. Jason knows DH has been diagnosed as bipolar, but I don't think Jim knows quite as much, because DH is afraid to tell him. Jason has kind of tended to lose interest in spending time with DH since this started, and I really can't blame him, it's absolutely no fun, even on the best days lately. He's whiney, full of self-pity, and can't do a single thing without spending money, and most of the time, doesn't get around to doing much at all. So when a person is broke, things are even worse. I'm married to him, I'll be there no matter what. But I can see where it would be hard for friends to want to be a part of that. I expect that in the next week or two, I'll have a chance to talk to Jim about everything, if he wants to bring it up (I won't, that's not for me to do), I'm sure he has a lot of questions. DH has told me that he has told Jim "a lot", but I get the impression that it has been "sugar-coated" because he doesn't want Jim to think less of him because of the mental illness. It's a troubling state. I am hopeful, though, that he won't lose these two friends, because they have been his friends since childhood, and so things will probably go on still.