Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Bipolar thoughts don't make sense.

I was hoping I could make my next post say something like "Well, he woke up and everything was much better." But it's about the same. DH talked to Jim about the job thing, and Jim told him the same things I did, and to forget about it, chalk it up to "bad luck".

So DH stayed in bed again all day today. Then he finally called me, about a half hour ago. I can't believe it, HE WENT BACK TO HIS WORKPLACE TO SEE IF HE HAD MISUNDERSTOOD. I had told him to stay away from there, Jim had told him to stay away from there, and DH had agreed that it was a good idea to stay away from there.

So he calls me and tells me that he went down there, and nobody (in the office) joked around with him and nobody talked to him. He asked to see his boss, and was told "she's not seeing anyone right now." Pretty much what I would've expected, given what he had told me the other day.

But apparently somehow, his bipolar thinking had convinced him that he had misunderstood, and so going down there set it all in motion again, just like it had just happened. I told him he needed to "let it go", "put it in the past", and he said he couldn't. I told him that he was in charge of how he responds to things, and if he can't get past this, he will end up in the hospital again. He told me I don't understand.

He's right. I don't understand his thinking at all. It's pretty clear to me: Something happened at work, they decided that it wasn't working out, got a replacement worker. Except for the fact that DH has no idea what happened (as far as I can tell anyhow), it seems pretty clear to me. No need to go back there and "make sure". To me, if someone says "Don't call us, we'll call you.", mostly you just assume that they're giving you the brush-off, and if someone actually calls, then it's a better day than you expected. I just don't get this "I just went down there to make sure". That is not how my rational DH thinks--when I married him, he was as clear-headed and perceptive as the next person. So it's gotta be the bipolar and the depression making him do this stuff?

I have briefly thought about going down there myself and politely asking the lady if she could help me understand what happened, so I can help DH not have to go through this again....but since I'm very shy and not very assertive, right now that doesn't seem like it'll happen...I had thought that maybe she could tell me what really happened, and then I wouldn't have to tell DH I was there, but I would have a better idea of what went on and how to help him...I don't even know if she would talk to me, though....well, probably a little daydream of mine....

Just an FYI for all of you: I might post later tonite, depending on what develops, but I have a day off work tomorrow, so unless I get to the library, I won't be posting until Saturday....but I'll give you the lowdown then, for sure.


gambling game lottery said...
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perphila said...

I hope the next few days get better. I am thinking about you....:)