Thursday, July 17, 2008

Bipolar logic at its best!

Today, DH called and said that he went down to the apartment building to turn in his keys. He told me that the lady seemed very humble and told him that she still wanted him to work there. He called me and said "I'm confused."
So here's our conversation:

Me: What's going on?

DH: I went into town and dropped off my keys and stuff at that apartment building. And (that lady) was there. And she said she still wants me to work for her.

Me: Bad idea. Did she pay you?

DH: No, but...


DH: But this shows that I didn't do anything wrong!

Me: Yes, it sure does, but so what? You now have that boost to your ego, that you didn't do anything wrong, now take that and your pride and tell her, "No, I can't work for someone who plays these games."

DH: I bet it was Dick at the hardware store, though. He must've stuck up for me. I can't let him down.

Me: Dick is a man. He will understand that you are not going to tolerate getting jacked around like this.

DH: But I really like the people!

Me: Look what this has done to you! It has set you way back in your recovery. You have been feeling bad, and every time you talk to those people you feel bad. BAD IDEA!!!

DH: But I need a job!

Me: I would rather you not work for the next year, before I would tell you to go back and do that again. There are other jobs out there, you just have to go and apply for them!

DH: I applied at Subway, the manager said that she has worked with the mental health program before...she's going to talk with the guy at the mental health jobs program.

Me: Oh that's wonderful!!!!!! It sounds very promising!!!! Good news!!!!

DH: But I was making a lot more at those apartments....

Me: What would you tell me if I was telling you this, if I was the one who had been treated like you have, and now I wanted to go back and work there again?

DH: I'd tell you you were crazy, and I'd probably get mad at you if you went back.

Me: So what's the difference here??? It's a BAD IDEA--DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT!!!

DH: (smiling and sarcastic at the same time) I'm not sure I'm understanding what you're saying!

Me: Right. Ask Jim. Ask anyone. Going back there is a bad idea, no matter what they say. Just take your pride and work for someone who is a) going to pay you for your work, and b) going to be straight with you.

DH: Oh, all right...

Me: Promise you won't go back there?

DH: I promise.

I couldn't believe that he was even giving this the time of day. I still have a lot to learn about mental illness, for sure. It's very hard for me to understand that he can't see this as clearly as any rational person would. But he did apply at Subway, that sounds GREAT!!!!

LOL, DH just called me back. He said, "I asked Jim what I should do. He said I should embrace the opportunity and go back there and work for free because I like the old people."

I said, "What did he really say?" DH said, "He said it was a really bad idea."


perphila said...

As long as you don't start believing the "logic" too you should be fine....:)

Lorna said...

I hope I didn't upset you yesterday with my comment :-S

Lol at the conversation, it is like talking to a child sometimes isn't it? We have conversations just like that too. x x