Saturday, January 5, 2008

Last Saturday Spenders Anonymous

I don't really know where to start. Remember "Chuck Wagon"? Well he (and his alter ego, too, LOL) is really getting on my nerves!!!!

Thursday night (Dec 27), DH stayed up all night playing that Sims game. He did not do anything else at all. He stayed up until 10am Friday morning, then went to bed. At 9pm Friday night, I warned him that he had Spenders Anonymous on Saturday and he should probably take his pills and get to bed at a decent time. Of course he said "Yeah, I know". And then he stayed up until 4am playing the Sims game again.

At 9:30am I woke him up for Spenders, he made a whole bunch of stupid excuses, like "the holidays are so hectic, lets wait until after New Years" and "I don't have enough gas" (countered that one with "I filled up my car so you could go to Spenders")....so he sat up and then fell asleep again. So I woke him up again. And he got so mad at me!!! This was very out of character for him, of course it was "That Guy" again....he got up, put his clothes on without speaking to me, slammed the bedroom door, slammed the front door, got in his car and left. I was upset, but just happy he was going to Spenders. But he came back a half hour later, because he had left in his own car and didn't have the gas to get there. He apologized to me, and told me I didn't deserve that kind of treatment, then he told me that the main reason he came back was that he was convinced that I was going to put a virus in his Sims game(???) (What the??!!)

I went to work on Saturday night, and I worked from 10pm to 8am. When I got home, DH was still up. Playing Sims. And the animals hadn't been fed. And Kirby had apparently needed to go out, and nobody had time for that either (yeck). And everything was filthy. I got very disgusted, took care of the animals, and left. And didn't answer my cell phone at all until I could tell DH was starting to worry.

I went home and told him that I don't ask much of him at all lately. And it seems kind of unfair that he plays that game 24 hours a day and I am working both jobs, and coming home to have to clean up a mess, take care of the animals, and make sure DD and my mom have what they need...and DH said "You're right, it's more than "kind of unfair", it's very unfair, and I will try to do better." I was hopeful, but it took a couple more tantrums from me to get the point across again. He's been doing more now, but still not much.

And he's been depressed. He called me last night and told me he's "a waste of a life". And he was feeling suicidal again. But he wouldn't call anyone. It's been a long time since he's been this down. I think he has therapy on Monday, and there's Spenders tomorrow, too....he told me he would never pull "that stuff" again, and that he would keep going to Spenders, so I will wake him up again tomorrow....