During all this drama with my mom, I've been so consumed with all the things that go along with the dementia, that I've hardly even written about DH. So I figured I'd give you a little lowdown....
I am really excited about things with DH, because it seems like the Depakote is really working. I'm almost afraid to say it out loud, but I've seen so many changes, that I have to chalk them up to something....
He's been more willing to do chores around the house. Sometimes I still need to remind him (ok, more than sometimes), but he's doing things. I admit, it's not anywhere near what he used to do, but he's taking his meds on a schedule. Not only that, but he's often taking them without me reminding him at all. Today he was out of cigarettes, and I told him that I wouldn't get them for him until he loaded the dishwasher and swept the floor. And he did both. No whining about it, either.
But here's another thing: (warning--animal lovers may be disturbed by the following, so if you might want to skip this part)--At the beginning of May, we had 29 ducks. For a while they were getting out of their pen and I couldn't figure out how. DH was no help at that time, and a bunch of ducks disappeared. I found and fixed the fence problem(s), and we were fine for a while. Then about a week ago, I noticed we were down to about 9 ducks. And a rooster, who had always preferred to live with the ducks, was missing, and all that remained was a big pile of feathers. That one was tough, because I was really attached to him. It was like a murder in the family. I cried. Then earlier this week, I realized we were down to only 5 ducks. Now we're only down to THREE. I pointed this out to DH and he has finally been able to take a gun and sit outside in hopes of killing a fox. This morning, he got up at 5am and went outside. And tonite he sat out there for over three hours. He told me to make sure he gets up at 4:30am tomorrow, so that he can make sure not to miss anything. I hope he kills it soon, because if he doesn't, I'm afraid we'll lose all the chickens, too. As much as I absolutely HATE taking care of those ducks in the winter, I'm really sad that this is happening and I hope it's over soon. About five years ago we had a fox that was getting our ducks, but DH was a lot more stable and healthy then, and it only took him 1 day and one bullet to get that fox.
Anyhow, I expressed my surprise at DH's willingness and ability to get up so early to watch for the fox (they usually come at sunup or sundown) and he told me he kind of liked it, because it made him feel useful and needed. I told him I hoped he put himself out of that job fast.
Oh. And on a day when I was particularly unhappy about having to buy his cigarettes (I just cannot afford them), I told him, "I'M SIGNING YOU UP FOR QUIT SMOKING CLASSES!!!" And you know what he said? This is going to blow some of you away. "I can't quit smoking, I LIKE smoking!!! Ok, I'll go, but you're going with me!"
So I guess I'm quitting smoking :-)
(no, I still don't smoke)