My mom: The weirdness continues....

My mom is supposedly done with her course of antibiotics for the UTI.  However, she's still saying weird things.  They've done extra lab work and nothing showed up.  But her ideas are still way out there.  Last night she was focused on her brother and sister in law who "had said they were coming tonite".  I knew they wouldn't come up, though, without contacting me to make sure it was a good time to visit.  So I tried to convince my mom that they were probably going to come some other night, and she then became convinced that she had heard a crash and (believing that it was a car crash) started to panic because she thought they'd been killed.

I read her a story and that seemed to calm her down a little, but I just wish I knew (once again) if this is "natural progression" or if there's something "fixable" going on--it's so hard to sit there and have a "conversation" with someone when they keep talking about things like they killed 14 people and so the police came and took her shoes, etc.....

Every time this happens, I freak out.  I wonder how close we are to the end, and part of me wants this to get over with, because it's so hard to stand by and not be able to help....and watch your mom going away little by little....... and part of me is absolutely terrified of losing my mom.

And I feel guilty because I don't have more time to spend with her.  I'm there every day, but the visits aren't very long, and I know we both wish they were.

I love my mom and, as I read through my blog, I recognize that this confusion has happened a number of times before, and there has always been a recovery of sorts....So really, if the past is any indicator, the odds are in favor of my "normal" mom coming back soon.  But I will be worrying until then.