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Thursday, May 24, 2012

Phone call re: DD

Hello, Carol?  This is the group home.  I'm calling about DD.

No, she's ok, there are just a few things I need to talk to you about.  Um, I'm not sure really how to bring this up but..... she has been bullying other clients.  We were wondering how you felt about us moving her to a different house...?

It's not just one other client, she's bullying all three of them.  They're so intimidated by her attitude and behavior that they barely come out of their rooms if she's around.  And we need to think of their safety, too.  She is insisting on receiving attention from staff all the time, and having angry outbursts if staff pays attention to the other clients.  She is cursing at the other clients, calling them "retarded" and bossing them around.

No, we haven't talked to DD or her social worker yet, we just wanted to notify you that this has been happening and we are trying to find a solution.

Yes, we can set up a meeting--next week, maybe?

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I have to say I'm not surprised really.  I'm surprised that it has taken this long.  But it looks like DD is not real welcome at her group home any more.  I know at her last "team meeting", the nurse for the group home asked me if DD gets this aggressive "seasonally"?  I told her she was "this aggressive" all the time and that is a big part of why she is currently living in the group home.  The nurse gave me a look like she thought I was exaggerating....but I figured she'd find out sooner or later.

So it looks like DD will be moving again.  I wish that her pdoc would try some kind of medication that could maybe tame her outbursts--she hasn't really been on much for that since they took her off all her meds in 2010 :-(  but I guess it's another case of "what do I know?  I'm not a doctor, I'm just the mom....."

Frankly, DD has been very hard to like for a few years now.  We love her and are still having her home for visits and such, but if I didn't have a moral obligation, I would definitely choose to not be around her.  And it sounds like several other people feel the same :-(

4 comments:

Miss Kitty said...

Oh, dear. What to do? That is such a difficult situation. And DD doesn't know how to control her outbursts, or what really sets her off; it's probably been this way her whole life. :-(

Many thoughts & prayers headed your way.

Miz Kizzle said...

Sorry to hear it. Does your DD have a job or some kind of activity to occupy her?

Anonymous said...

Heheh, a job? As a bouncer, maybe - until she started bouncing every single customer that tried to come thru the door...

Anonymous said...

I think DD has to come to a realization about health and wellness and make her own choices about deciding to do what is necessary in herself and her life and her behaviour to become as well as she can. I cannot imagine the life she has.