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Friday, October 5, 2007

Something's just not right

I just got off the phone with DH again and I don't know what to think (more drama, of course). He sounds like he's had too much to drink or is overmedicated or something, his voice sounds "thick" like it's hard for him to talk, almost like it's such a struggle to be conscious that he can't talk right.

He swears that he hasn't done anything he shouldn't, and that he hasn't overdone any of his PRN Lorazepam that he takes for anxiety. I don't necessarily believe him, of course, I've been lied to too many times throughout this ordeal. When I asked him what he was so upset about last night, he still doesn't know. He says he doesn't feel right. When I asked him again if I had said or done something to upset him, he says he doesn't know.

I don't know what to do to stop worrying. I worry that the animals are making him angry because he isn't usually alert enough to pay attention to their patterns. For example, Molly, one of the dogs, needs to go outside at midnight, otherwise she will NEED to go out before 7am. But I'm not sure that when I'm gone, he can remember that, and then I think he gets angry when she needs to go out at 4am because she's been holding it since midnite. But he gets so angry over so many things these days, I don't have a clue how to stop all the things that make him angry.

P.S. In case you were wondering, I don't think he gets abusive towards the animals when they make him angry (when I'm not home), he just gets angry. Although I have been thinking about getting some sort of recording device just to make sure....nobody (none of the animals) seems afraid of him, and nobody seems any worse for wear when I get back from work, so I'm about 85% sure that he doesn't hit them or kick them or anything like that...

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